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Starting Over Living with Purpose by Tony Robbins #audiobook #motivation

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Tony Robbins is one of the most famous and great mentor <br> <h3>Auto Generated Captions</h3>

but in the end the most important thing
is what’s the purpose of your life why
are you here that’s what we want to talk
about today we got a look at what makes
you really do what you do everything on
earth has a purpose and you do to that
purpose provides an inner drive that
once you tap into it can give your life
immense fulfillment it’ll also give you
certainty because you know right now
we’re in a world that’s changing so
rapidly that virtually every time you
turn around you hear about something
else that’s changing and I personally
get to a deal with hundreds of thousands
of people per year I see about 250 to
300 thousand people a year in my live
programs and I hear so much excitement
and also hears so much fear about the
pace of change I mean we’ve all talked
about changes happening so rapidly now
in paradigm shifts all that stuff has
become so overused at this point that
we’ve become numb to it but it’s true
never in the history of the world of
things change so rapidly so you need to
find something that’s eternal inside of
yourself that no matter what changes on
the surface this part of you does not
change it’s the part you come back to
the part that guides you the part that
really makes you fulfilled and that’s
your purpose because all of a sudden
when you find out a friend’s got cancer
or you turn around and you see that
35,000 people IBM got laid off or an
entire industry disappeared overnight
because a new one was created it’ll give
you a way to find some good and
virtually anything your purpose is
available to you at any moment in your
life but you got to know what it is
before we get into it let me back up a
little bit here okay I have a good
friend is one of the most successful
financial people in the country he works
in all these financial markets he’s
incredibly successful businessman and I
know he’s working very hard right now on
a goal and I went to visit him recently
and boy he’s working hard he’s gonna
achieve that goal but you know when the
goals finally there then he’s gonna be
happy I thought no no no no you know
each moment we’ve got to be able to find
some sense of meaning for our life
something that is significant something
is useful and we all know this is not a
new conversation but as your coach and
as your friend in these tapes I’d like
to draw your attention to some things
that maybe you already know but haven’t
thought about for a while maybe get you
to put some of your focus into the most
important area life which is enhancing
meaning see all of us in life have to
have a reason to be here if all you’re
doing out there is going out and trying
to achieve goals and then you achieve
them and I’m sure you’ve run into that
trip up wire that says okay I’ve
achieved the goal and now what right we
achieve the goal on your brain says is
this all there is
see the purpose of a goal as I’ve shared
with you so many times is not to achieve
the goal the purpose of the goal is what
it makes of us as people who we become
ultimately with though we have to have a
sense that who we even have become has
some kind of meaning without that
there’s not a reason to live it’s not a
reason to get up there’s not a reason to
go out there and make it happen what’s
really controlling this man’s life is
fear when people say they’re cynical or
they’re pessimistic what they’re really
screaming out to you is I’m scared out
of my mind I’m afraid to dream again I’m
afraid to think about what’s possible
I’m afraid to really put myself on the
line and say I’m gonna go for something
I’m gonna stand for something I’m gonna
put myself in line in a relationship or
my business or my vision to make a
difference in the world because you know
what maybe at one time this person did
that maybe they’ve tried it several
times and it didn’t work and they got
pain and pain and pain but he said they
didn’t want the pain so they stopped
dreaming he stopped and visioning he
stopped coming up with meaning instead
they trying to keep themself away from
the pain by saying well there’s no
meaning at all anyway but unfortunately
that gives you the ultimate pain because
it gives you a life without meaning and
no one can live a life that’s fulfilled
without a sense of meaning see we’ve
been put here for a reason the question
is why and the answer I think is
different for every one of us is
different for me than it is for you and
yet it’s the same every one of us has
been put here every one of us is unique
and different and special and I believe
our Creator if I’m gonna use the word
God if I’m a God has put you here for a
reason
questions what is it God does not create
things without a purpose everything on
earth serves the purpose why are you
here what are you here to do what are
you here to become to create and to give
these are some of the most significant
questions that you can answer in your
life and even when you answer them I’m
sure that as your life expands you’ll
come up with better answers as you get
more experience and you get closer and
touch with your own innermost being and
maybe your closer in touch with your
Creator as well he says Tony where are
you going
with this I’m really going to the
essence of giving your life what you
deserve which is knowing that there are
no mistakes knowing that every little
thing you do has a consequence it can be
a positive consequences if you choose it
the most powerful thing that has
consequence in your life though is the
thing we talk about so often but I gotta
say it again and that is what’s really
ultimately shaping our lives our
decisions the first decision is a
decision about what to focus on where
your focus goes gonna determine how you
think how you feel what you do
ultimately what your life turns out like
what you’re able to contribute the
bottom line is we must find an
empowering focus out of any situation
the second decision that shapes our life
and the meaning of our lives are the
decisions that we make about what
something means meaning as ultimately
something we determined that’s the
exciting part about it and that’s the
scary part about it and the third
decision of course is what are you going
to do when something happens see so much
of the fear that we see in life comes
from the fact that most of us don’t feel
like we’re in control we’re running
around trying to control all the events
of our lives and every single one of us
is going to experience multiple
situations in our life that no matter
how skillful we are well we cannot
control the event well it’s just not
something that we can control because we
didn’t initiate it anytime you’re
dealing with other people this is gonna
happen anytime you’re dealing with
Mother Nature this is gonna happen most
of us in life are so afraid something’s
gonna happen that we can’t control and
therefore we’re gonna get pain that we
try to avoid those things we can’t
control we try to shape our lives where
we spend our time who we spend our time
with what we do by environments that we
feel really comfortable in when we feel
like we’re really in control in them but
what that does is it limits the shape
and quality of our lives we’ve got to be
able to put ourselves out there to
discover what we’re really capable of
them or putting environments when we
don’t know what to do we don’t know what
things mean when we’re not sure it’s in
those environments that we grow the most
it’s in those environments we discover
more of our true purpose as human beings
it’s there that our character is shaped
you know so many times we set goals or
we have dreams or we have plans and we
work our tail off and it doesn’t come
out the way we want and a lot of people
come out of those situations
disillusioned or
angry or resentful or frustrated they
look for someone to blame but you know
sometimes I really truly believe that
not getting your goal as part of the
design it’s part of the game plan
causing you to dig inside and discover
more of yourself to really begin to use
your real capacity as human being those
traits that are within you that only
expand when they’re challenged when
demands are made upon them
you know I truly believe that God is not
so much interested in our convenience as
he is in our character you know and I
also believe that because something
hasn’t happened right away when you
wanted it and design didn’t work out
doesn’t mean it’s not gonna happen it’s
really a test of how committed are you
it’s really a test designed to make you
become more gods delays are not God’s
denials unless you give up of course if
you don’t do your part then of course
whatever you’ve envisioned will never
come to be but we have to be willing to
continue to put ourselves forth and know
that events will show up that we can’t
control so let me ask you a question you
go okay I understand all this Tony but
how do you ever have a sense of
certainty in a world that’s changing all
the time well you set goals you do all
the right things and it still doesn’t
always turn out right how do you live in
a world where suddenly something can
happen it could take away your whole
business or you know a storm could come
and take away your home or or some
calamity can happen to your personal
family or a disease could hit or or
someone could die
how do you deal with all that and the
answer is you have to know the one thing
you can control is not events where you
control is what things mean to you and
therein comes the secret to life because
no matter what happens in your life the
meaning of what has happened is yours
you get to determine it as long as
you’re conscious and you don’t allow the
people around you to teach you what to
think and as long as you don’t just go
on automatic pilot and allow your
nervous system to make up connections
that are false let me give an example of
what happens to people certainly by now
you realize that what you do is human
being is primarily driven by your need
to avoid pain your desire for pleasure
right but see all of us have learned
through life that certain things mean
more pain than others and so some people
are driven by their fear right to
experience the emotion of fear is the
most incredible painful thing they could
ever imagine so they’ll do anything to
avoid being in a fearful situation
people are driven by their desire to
feel the sense of adventure obviously
they make decisions differently they
focus on different things in life they
can walk in the same room as someone who
lives in fear and they’re gonna notice
different things they’re gonna want to
sit in a different place they’re gonna
want to try a different kind of vacation
than someone who’s trying to focus on
how to be secure what drives you are you
driven by guilt are you driven by your
past when when you were to use the word
driven the word drive it really means to
guide to control or to direct something
so what’s guiding you what’s controlling
you what’s directing your behavior
what’s directing your focus what’s
directing the meaning you’re pulling
from your life what is it is it your
parents is it the competition you have
with somebody else is it wanted to prove
somebody wrong is it your desire to
contribute is it your desire for joy or
happiness or is it a sense of purpose
that’s driving you a sense there’s
something out there for you to do
there’s something you’re designed to
evolve into to become to share to give
to create you don’t even know what it is
but you’re willing to trust that each
day more of its gonna come out see
whatever drives you
that’s what’s shaping your life and the
challenge is that most of us never
consciously decide what we’re gonna have
drive our life see we’re not
stimulus-response
animals but we can be stimulus-response
animals our nervous systems are designed
to help us they’re designed to be a
source of decision-making they’re
designed to help us very quickly when
you have an experienced figure out what
is the source of that pain so we can
avoid it in the future what is that
source of that pleasure so we can have
more of it in the future but when we
don’t think things through when we don’t
think things through in an empowering
way we don’t have faith that there’s a
higher meaning we tend to settle like
animals for the lowest meaning that we
can find well this is happening because
I’m a bad person this is happening
because there’s something wrong with me
this is happening because I’m just
destined to fail or worse very often in
life we don’t even consciously think
things through our nervous system just
makes quick decisions hey every moment
you’re alive whatever you have a
significant amount of pain your brain
says hey what is the source of this pain
and it uses three criteria I’m sure you
remember to determine what the source of
your pain is it looks for something that
is happening about the same time you’re
having the pain that is unique because
after all you weren’t feeling pain a
moment ago you got pain now what’s
unique about
the situation it looks for something
that is recent something’s happening
about the same time you have the pain
and it also looks for something that is
consistent something that whenever you
have had pain in the past this has also
been a factor in that situation let me
tell you how these three criteria can
help you you go out one day when you’re
a child and you touch a hot stove you
feel some pain you pull it back your
brain says okay what was unique to that
moment that gave me the pain it looks
around us inside this burner right and
says what was happening about the same
time I felt the pain I was touching this
burner and what’s consistent about it
well maybe nothing until you do it again
after doing it two or three times or
maybe one time does it hurt enough maybe
one time is consistent it’s like when
somebody says to you always do that you
know I don’t always do that yes you do
you always do it I’ve done it one time
yeah but well that’s always what human
beings can make one time consistent if
it’s painful enough so the bottom line
is what do you learn your nervous system
learns you don’t grab burners alright
you just don’t do that and so in the
future when you’re trying to make a
decision about what to focus on what
things mean and what to do and you’re
going buy a burner one of the options is
not to go grab that baby just for fun so
as basic as this lesson is we feel to
realize that this simple system that
assists us so much in making decisions
because it helps us discover what is the
source of our pain or our pleasure so we
can avoid the pain gain the pleasure in
the future this simple system can be
misguided or misinterpret information
see here’s how it works I’ll give you an
example I was doing a date with destiny
only a couple weekends ago and um
several people are having major
challenges in their life and one lady
just couldn’t get herself to really have
any meaning in her life and as I kept
digging digging digging the real problem
that she had is he felt lonely because
she felt disconnected because she wanted
to have someone she could share her life
with but she couldn’t get herself to do
that why would you guess someone
couldn’t get themself to be able to
share their life not hard to figure out
is it pain person obviously as I guessed
had a painful relationship in the past
which she had it was so painful that she
linked up in her head that marriage
because she’d had a previous one that
was painful equals death no not to kind
of keep you away from getting into
closer relationship right how did her
brain do that well she said she was in
this relationship but was so great but
after they got married this man became
physically abusive verbally abusive
he basically did everything he could to
control every aspect of her life and the
worst thing of all when she finally got
up developed the courage to divorce this
man he threatened dolly her life but he
also threatened their own son’s life now
when that happens she got linked up
marriage equals death to not only me but
potential loss of the life of my child
that’s even more than the loss of her
own life for her well it’s not too hard
to figure out that if your brain says
why am i feeling his ultimate pain and
it looks for something unique and says
well because I’m married and then it
looks around and says what was happening
about the same time I felt the pain
marriage and you say what was consistent
during the pain you go marriage pretty
soon you can avoid marriage but it
doesn’t stop there
her brain also linked up that the cause
of her pain was something else two men
was after all what was unique I had this
man around I was married to a man right
and then secondly what else was going on
well
about the same time I was feeling the
pain I was with this man and sure enough
what was recent this man right about the
time I had the pain he was there every
time so sure enough all of a sudden
she’s avoiding all men but it didn’t
stop there
she also linked up that the reason she
felt this pain was because she trusted
so as a result her brain linked up
unconsciously if you trust then you will
die now I would say to you the opposite
is true if you don’t trust if you don’t
have faith then you instantly die
internally you may not die physically
but you die emotionally because anything
that’s worth living in life requires
faith it requires trusting it requires
knowing that you can get out of the
chair and walk on this floor and when
you step out on the floor you don’t stop
and have to analyze can I do this and
you don’t weigh everything and think
about your weight and the structure of
the floor and what’s underneath that you
just trust otherwise you’d be
immobilized you have to trust the drive
a car you have to have faith to enter a
relationship you have faith to start a
business you have to faith when all of a
sudden somebody this company says these
35,000 people are gone into faith that
if you’re one of those 35,000 that there
is a better plan for you and that you
will now act on that faith and take
action and find that better plan that
better solution for your life you must
have that you lose trust you lose
meaning when you lose meaning you lose
your life again maybe not physically but
certainly emotional
and when you lose it emotionally the
physical loss of life often is not that
far behind medical researchers are now
proving the mind-body connection is not
some psycho babble but a physical
reality that the way we think in the way
we feel about our lives affects us
physically in fact dr. Chopra recently
shared with me that there is a new study
that was done in the state of
Massachusetts where they began to study
what causes someone to die of their
first heart attack before the age of 50
were they never gonna have a chance I
was what was the number one risk factor
they wanted to know and they assumed
that what would cause someone to die
from just their very first heart attack
never gonna the chance would be a person
just had so much cholesterol in their
body the body wasn’t able to recover and
they found out that was not the number
one risk factor and they thought well
maybe that diabetes maybe it was more of
a genetic factor they had once again
disprove that theory with the Department
of Health Education and Welfare for the
state of Massachusetts states in their
article clearly is the most important
risk factor determine that you will die
of your first heart attack and not get a
second chance is what they call job
dissatisfaction you’ve got to have a
deeper meaning for your life and now I’m
on that grindstone again I’m on that
treadmill no wonder most people life
turn to alcohol or drugs or television
and even then they can’t find something
entertaining themselves even then little
sense any fulfillment because
distraction does not create a life of
significance distraction does not create
joy distraction will not give you what
you’re seeking drugs will not change
your life for the better right what
they’ll do is hurt you they don’t create
pain and there all kinds of drugs
anything that doesn’t expand you as a
human being or allow you to share more
love and joy with others in a natural
way that enhances your physiology and
your mind your emotions and your spirit
is something you probably don’t need you
got to grow
you got expand you got to contribute you
got to know that you’re here for a
purpose there are no mistakes there is a
meaning even if you haven’t found it yet
you must discover it and you know what
for most people they don’t discover the
meaning of their life until their life
is over what a sad place to be or until
they have a life-threatening illness or
until somebody very close to them that
they love is about to leave them
you don’t have to wait for the pain to
discover the meaning so why no one I
found the purpose of my life you decide
what it is you discover it and you
decide this is it maybe later on I’ll
refine it it probably will but for right
now this is why I’m playing the game of
life this is what it’s about everyday if
I’m just being this way if I’m just
doing these kinds of simple things with
other people with myself then I know I’m
on track I know there’s a reason for my
existence we all have that I know you
know a story of Victor Franco right the
manner up man’s search for meaning
here’s a man who’s in a Nazi
concentration camp with pain everywhere
around him knowing any moment he could
be gassed or may be spared and if you’re
spared he’d have the unique privilege of
going out and taking the dead bodies out
of those gas chambers putting them in
the big ovens talk about intense and yet
somehow in the midst of that pain he
found a deeper meaning the meaning was
that even though he was in pain in the
moment but somehow someday he would
survive this and he would come to share
the story so that this would never
happen to other people in the future he
couldn’t find a meaning in the moment he
found a meaning in the future and for
most of us the meaning that we want for
our lives is here today and it’s
preparing us for an even greater meaning
in the future if well just use all of
our life’s experience the pain and the
pleasure to become more to prepare
ourselves for whatever it is that our
Creator has brought us here for to
prepare ourselves so that at the moment
of truth when we’re needed we will
deliver and my real belief is we’re
gonna be delivering all along the way it
isn’t something that some day you’re
gonna do it’s something new every day
are doing you know my former spouse
Becky just recently lost her father and
it’s been a tough time for her because
in a very short period of time here
she’s lost both her mom and her dad and
that’s an event you cannot control and
God knows we tried you know three years
ago when they told us that father had
cancer they told us that he would die
within a period of anywhere from three
to six months and we just did not allow
them to tell him that for the obvious
reasons you know how odd I believe from
all the people we’ve learned from from
everyone from dr. Bernie Siegel to
Norman Cousins to dr. Deepak Chopra we
understand the
body connection if someone decides that
because they have some dis-ease in their
body what it means is they’re gonna die
then of course they will and fortunately
he never found out that diagnosis and
what we did is we kept making sure he
had a compelling future he had a sense
of meaning a variety of things that he
was needed for and it was amazing how he
physically responded when we had trips
scheduled for him to go to Fiji on which
he went on and talking about how we
needed his help with our resort there
and helping some of the fugiens in the
garden because the garden for him
created so much meaning in his life it’s
about supporting about nurturing about
helping life along a little bit
and so he was excited about things we
wanted to do with his grandkids and so
we kept giving him compelling futures
and sure enough three months went by he
was healthy six months went by he was
healthy a year went by and through a
variety of interventions pretty soon he
seemed to be better until just recently
when we started getting phone calls from
his neighbors he lived up in a place
called Ram Colorado a little town with
14 people in it
then he’s been a major part of for years
and years and they started call us to
tell us that they didn’t think he could
take care of himself anymore so we flew
out and brought him back here and the
first few days he was in phenomenal
shape it was like he was completely
restored being around the grandkids and
and being in the environment he was all
excited to share about things that
happen in his little town of ran that he
helped to create there about all about
the calves that he helped to deliver and
about the planting season and how they
helped people through the winter and
some of the stories they’ve been telling
and he was just totally alive and then
we took him to doctors for a series of
tests they said they wanted to keep him
overnight the next day we called and I
spoke to his main doctor and he said it
looks like he just has a form of
meningitis so he said that’ll be really
easily treatable and he should be okay
and he said so don’t worry he said we’re
just gonna do a series of more tests
because he’s a bit dehydrated he lives
at an altitude of about 11,500 feet and
he’s not drinking enough water and he
said so you know we’re gonna run a
couple more tests he said next day he
said but I think he’ll be fine he said I
have to go out of town he said my you
know partner doctor will be working with
him so he said I’ve passed on all the
information you can check in with him
tomorrow well the next day Becky wanted
to go see your dad and I was out doing a
seminar and I got a phone call and the
phone call was that they’ve done
additional tests
and that they found out that the cancer
had spread throughout his spine and into
his brain and while it wasn’t treatable
before when they told us three years ago
it’s certainly not treatable now and
that they thought he would die within
weeks the worst part was though they
also told this to him before they told
it to Becky so he had no one there to
support him through the process or to
give him other options when I found this
out I became so angry with the doctors
cuz I focused on how he’d violated what
we asked them to do and how the other
doctor should have told his partner
doctor not to tell him yet to allow us
to talk to him to prepare him for the
situation that was so harsh it was so
unfair and and the meaning of it was
that it was gonna really harm him and it
all said he would give up hope and what
I wanted to do was lash out and
fortunately I didn’t lash out instead I
started focusing on what it’s happening
to see so what can I do so I went to go
see him and talk to him and it was
unbelievable he looked like he just aged
10 years in a day because what happened
is he had no future there was no purpose
in fighting the pain or trying to make
things happen or you know trying to tell
stories or do anything because after all
you’re gonna die anyway soon and that
was kind of the way he was interpreting
it sure enough no matter what we said he
just didn’t seem to respond he’s just he
seemed to go into a total stupor and for
the next day and a half or so he just
sat in a corner and he really didn’t say
very much or communicate very much he
just said not to bother with him that he
was fine but he didn’t open up
emotionally and I just sat down with him
and I I cried and I told him how much I
loved him and how much Becky loved him
and how he needed to share with us what
he was really feeling because you know
holding that back wasn’t keep protecting
us from pain we just felt separate from
him that he could choose how what this
was gonna mean for his life that he the
doctors had told us three years ago that
he was gonna die within a matter of
months then and here it was three years
later I said what if you would have just
sat around for three years in this
little corner doing nothing because you
thought you’re gonna die any day or any
week I said that’d be pretty crazy on he
started laughs I said look at this I
said you can’t just sit off in this
corner hey you might die tomorrow you
might die in six weeks you might die in
six months in my dad in six years you
might die in ten or twenty years and
really screw these people’s brains up I
said it doesn’t matter how long you’re
gonna live what’s gonna matter is how
are you gonna live while you’re here I
said you’ve lived an incredible life in
World War two
you were a pilot you know you’re a
businessman now you’re this guy who’s
touching this little town up in Colorado
everybody knows you and cares about you
and loves you because you love them I
said you braise these incredible kids I
said you know if you’re gonna go go out
and style go out because you decided to
go out in an energy that you want to
where you really enjoy your life don’t
just shut down because somebody told you
life’s over cuz you buy into it don’t do
it and then he said well you know Tony
said the truth is I’m not afraid to die
and he said everything he said is true
he said you know my life has been so
rich he says I feel like you know I’ve
lived my purpose now you know I’m I look
around and I see my kids and I see what
they’re like as people and I see what
I’ve done and and I think maybe it’s
time for me to go now
I said listen if you’re deciding to do
that because you really want to go I
said then you know I love you I mean so
you know I I’m sure I’m gonna cry and
I’m not gonna try and keep you here and
not just because we love you I said but
at the same time don’t leave cuz
somebody tells you it’s time to go he
said well I don’t know I said well when
it’s time to go you’ll know I said you
can go consciously you can decide when
it’s time you don’t have to wait til the
paynus on tenth you can’t stand it but
the same time don’t go any quicker then
your meaning is done I think right now
you’re teaching your family a lot of new
lessons he said yeah that’s probably
true I said so what do you want to do
how do you want to do things I said
let’s get your Fanny out of here let’s
get about and we have this great
conversation and talked about all kinds
of things I won’t bore you the details
but I let him know then you never have
to worry about his daughter and and that
she’d become the kind of person he could
always be proud of him he was amazing
cuz the next three four five days he
came to life all of a sudden there was a
purpose and things again all of a sudden
he was alive he’d go out by the pool and
tell stories and so forth and he went
over to the Polo Grounds and did all
kinds of just really great things and
then I went away for a seminar and I
came back two days later and it was like
he was gone he could barely even talk
he’s having a difficult time holding
himself up he had have round-the-clock
care for him pretty soon he wasn’t able
to carry on a conversation he would
start talking gibberish and start seeing
things that were invisible and point to
them
we could tell the end was coming and as
the end star to come there was more and
more pain and tears and we felt at all
and also at the same time reminded
ourselves that hey we’re making this
thing that it’s lost because of our
short-term thinking about this man in
his body in his presence but his life
will live on beyond just physical
presence here and for him what it
probably means his freedom finally be
free of the painful body he’s been in
for so many years for him it’s a chance
to be with his wife Becky’s mom she has
to be whether the loved ones there was
another meaning that could give you joy
at the same time you’re feeling pain and
so will you try to focus on those and
then one night I got home and all the
sudden I was called by the nurse she
told me that thank his dad had just
passed away sure it was back then we
cried and we talked the same time she
felt incredible sense of peace for him
it’s amazing now instantly how he felt
could change just by changing what we
focused on for more loss to his gained
to the feeling of joy for him to be free
we couldn’t control the event but we
could certainly direct our own minds I
think and beyond ourselves to something
deeper to a deeper meaning in life
I got back yesterday from going with
Becky up to this little town and ran
Colorado well Don I’d never been to
before but Becky had been there many
times and I got a chance to see where
Cecil lived and the impact he had he
didn’t really want a funeral he never
liked people quote put on airs for
anything he was a simple man with simple
values and a simple mission when I got
there I looked around and he never
explicitly said what the mission of his
life was the purpose of his life but in
a town of 14 people on we went out to
this gravesite put his body into the
ground and suddenly person after person
started showing up we knew all 14 people
be there because we merely touched them
all
they all loved him he was the
storyteller because the man had took an
old car years ago and painted it black
and white but a star on the side but a
dummy inside glasses made it look like a
police car so that people came running
through this little town which consists
about seven or eight buildings that they
might slow down his house was called the
rand yacht club because he invited
everybody up for coffee every single
morning at least 300 days a year
figured I could tell him a story and
cheer him up used to relavant they were
called the liars lair
the reason was because he had people
he’d tell people stories and you tell
the wildest tales and get people to
believe them sure enough after about 10
or 15 years they began to realize that
some of these things were stories and
they all laughed as they told me stories
about this incredible man who touched
their lives when we got to the gravesite
not only did 14 people show up but in
this little town it’s four hours outside
of Denver people came from all over
people came from my homey people came
from Denver pretty soon there were a
hundred people at a gravesite where
there’s not supposed to be a service to
honor a man it touched their lives so we
said you know you don’t having a formal
service cuz that’s not what he wanted
but before we put his body in the ground
as a anybody like to say anything and
they all talked about how he touched
them how their life was greater because
he was such a loving soul and his smile
attached them his stories had touched
them but just his manner that he was a
lover of people and animals that because
he’d been in this town their lives would
never be the same the people who come
through the town just for a day just
there’s a little kindness he was a man
who said and if you can’t say something
nice about something don’t say anything
at all he never said a negative word
about anybody in fact one man probably
the most telling tale of this man’s life
he said cecil’s the kind of guy said a
sat down one day with him and said what
are you doing about all those rodents
that keep stealing all our animals are
you poison in them are you shooting them
you’re trapping them are you killing
what are you doing because they’re
taking all my stuff in Cecil said and I
said I just plant twice as much I
thought what a life what a man
say his life was his mission his mission
was real simple love people love animals
love beings make the world a little bit
better by just being nice he lived a
life of significance one that had
meaning he didn’t go out and change
everything on earth he didn’t make a
billion dollars
he doesn’t have people writing him up
everywhere but he changed people’s lives
and he died in his sleep out of pain the
day he decided to go and he created in
his family a greater sense of courage to
look at life in a new way and a greater
sense of dedication to give even more he
added to our drive he had at our
commitment to be givers in life as he
was – any soul who had the privilege of
coming across his path
I hope it also makes you think about
what’s most important in your life I
remember an interview with Michael
Hendon in Life magazine when he knew he
was gonna go he said quote somebody
should tell us right at the start of our
lives that were dying and we might live
life to the limit every minute of every
day do what I say whatever you want to
do do it now there are only so many
tomorrow’s if you and I are gonna live
our lives fully and then maybe sometimes
we can take the experiences of those
around us and learn from them we can
learn that in all of our lives worried
the warnings or examples cecil’s life
was an incredible example he didn’t
think anything in life was insignificant
not a rodent not a flower and not an
animal not a stranger passing through he
lived by a philosophy that they also
live in Fiji by the way Fiji was his
favorite place the last things he told
me was the happiest time his life last
few years were the trips he took to Fiji
I think it’s because he felt like there
everybody understood what he understood
the life is meant to be a happy to be a
joy to appreciate the little things as
well as the big things to appreciate one
another to be givers to be lovers of
life I say to you that if you’re driven
by anything other than your love then
your spirit and your desire to
contribute your desire to grow and
expand if you’re driven by their need to
please others if you’re driven by your
fear if you driven by your past maybe
it’s time to free yourself and the way
to do it is decide decide consciously
what you want your life to be about
decide consciously what’s the purpose of
your life something simple something you
can live every single day you know I
think that when I look at people’s lives
and I see the people who are having so
much difficulty I think the number one
reason why people fail to experience joy
and life experience life as a win it’s
not because their life isn’t the wind
because the wind can be just reaching
out and touching somebody around you the
wind can be just telling somebody that
you love them the wind can be taking
care of your body God’s temple
the wind can be stopping and feeling
grateful the wind could be anywhere you
don’t have to land on the moon to have
the wind and you can enjoy landing on
the moon too how much better to enjoy
the process because we’re gonna spend
most of our life in process towards the
achievement of goals and I’m not saying
don’t go do things and I’m not saying
don’t have grand schemes and dreams and
I’m not saying don’t do those because
our lives are better because people have
dreamed huge dreams and they’ve made
them happen but I’m saying don’t do it
at the expense of not appreciating
what’s true along the way and with
cecil’s reminder service all those
little things that are so so important
and we’ve always believed they’re
important I feel like we’ve always lived
that they’re important but I just want
to redouble the effort it’s part of my
commitment to him and I saw and he has
honor I challenge you to do the same I
challenge you to hold yourself to a
higher standard I challenge you to
realize that you’re here for a purpose
there’s something for you to do and be
here for yourself and for others you
can’t just do for others not do for
yourself or you won’t be here so this is
really designed to get you to ask
yourself are you being efficient are you
being effective in your life there’s a
big difference if you’re being efficient
then what you’re doing is you’re doing
things right but if you’re being
effective you’re doing the right things
are you doing the things that are gonna
give you the most joy in your life why
are you doing what you’re doing and
where is it taking you you know we all
need to have what I call a code of
conduct a set of standards we hold
ourselves to every day about how we’re
gonna be as people the kinds of states
we’re gonna live in because it’s out of
those states that we affect everyone
around us just stop and think about
what’s most important think about why
you’re here what’s the purpose of your
life step out of the moment and into
eternity think about what’s eternal when
you’re feeling insecure start to realize
there is something inside of you that is
never-ending that there’s something
inside of you that is unchangeable and
that’s the part of you that knows what
is right what to do and why you’re here
so you know that may sound metaphysical
it may sound religious or spiritual call
it whatever you want
but know that the bottom line is that
you are here for a reason and that it’s
a special reason that only you know and
it may be that you haven’t found it
because you’re looking for something
huge and it may be that you’re living it
right now you’re just not appreciating
your purpose maybe what you’re doing
right now is your life purpose this
thing that you detest most or maybe what
it is doing is giving you the challenge
to really discover something within
yourself that allow you to give and be
more because life is about two things
being and doing how are you gonna be as
a human being I mean ultimately our
destiny is who do we become as people
and what do you do what do you
contribute that’s what it’s about
that’s what gives us a sense of
fulfillment and a life of significance
is one of growth and contribution it’s
one you decide what your life’s about
simply are you what are you here for you
here to live to learn to grow to share
to love what are you here for I’m asking
these questions I’m hoping you’re
thinking not just listening to me what
is the special plan for you you’ve got
to discover the purpose of your life
there is a plan there’s something here
for you that’s different than anybody
else in the world and you’ve got to
discover what it is and the best way to
discover is just trust your instinct and
say what is if it was simple was clear
and I was living every day why am I here
because if you never discover your
purpose how can you ever win the game of
life how can you really enjoy it
thoroughly so I look around at people so
often they’re so unhappy and I think the
reason is that they don’t ever win the
game of life it’s a game they feel like
they can’t win like they’re always
losing and the reason number one is I
think there’s seven reasons I’ll give
you seven I’ve jotted some down you know
I think number one is I think most
people never win the game of life I
never feel fulfilled I never feel joy
because they don’t know the purpose of
the game if you don’t know the purpose
of the game what’s your chances of ever
winning i’ve ever get a ring the bell
feel that sense of fulfillment or joy or
passion or love or whatever it is that
you truly want at the deepest level see
if you don’t know the purpose the game
you don’t know the goal is pretty hard
to set up your game to win isn’t it
pretty soon you start pursuing things
that don’t give you fulfillment we live
in somebody else’s life other than your
own you gotta know what are you doing it
all for what do you really want when I
ask most people this question what do
you want they give me answers like well
I know
I don’t want to live this way anymore I
don’t want to feel like hell anymore
that’s not gonna give you what you want
what do you really want oh I want to
finally be financially secure so I can
retire great
you know statistics about retirement
actuaries a statistics from insurance
companies show that three years after a
man retires specifically I’m using men
guess what happens he dies to retire is
to die and for some people this is like
their major aim think about it
retirement is gonna make you happy you
gotta have a purpose you got to know
what it is you got to decide what it is
at least for now know that that vision
will continue to expand second reason
why most people fail at the game called
life cuz even though they don’t know the
purpose of the game they got tons of
rules about how it must be played they
don’t even know the goal making all
these rules they gotta live by and
nothing do they have rules for
themselves
but they have rules for everybody else
around them rules for how their spouse
should be rules about how their boss
should be rules from people they don’t
even know on the street should be you
know it’s so often in life we get upset
with other people and it’s not about the
other people it’s about our rules
they’re doing something we know they
shouldn’t be doing or they’re not doing
something we know they should be doing
right we need to just relax a little bit
we need to realize that whatever people
are doing they got a reason it may not
be a very intelligent reason by our
perspective but who are we to say and
you know what and maybe it isn’t an
intelligent reason by lots of people’s
ideas but you know what is a reason I
mean it all comes down how do we wire
ourselves as human beings see whenever
you see somebody you think they’re doing
something crazy have some compassion
are there any stupid things you’ve never
done in your lifetime or crazy
I would hallucinate based on my own
personal experience answer maybe you
betcha from the bottom line is we got to
understand that things are going on that
we don’t understand with people I
remember one time I was talking to
Stephen Covey about times what we
misinterpreted people’s behavior and he
told me about this time when he got in a
subway and his man walked in and brought
on a bunch of his kids
and they were just running rampant
screaming yelling making noise creating
havoc and you know Stephens more of a
mellow centered kind of guy he doesn’t
like the kind of environment even on the
subway and the bottom line is you know
he didn’t want to say anything but he
found himself getting more and more
irritating the man scene he’s just
ignoring the kids like they don’t even
matter what they were doing so he found
himself
the point we actually spoke up so Steven
turned him and said you know do you
think you might want to do something
about these children and the man looked
at him and said oh yeah I guess I should
huh he said we just got back to the
hospital with her mother just died he
said I just don’t think they know how to
deal with it he said quite honestly
neither do I said he felt like absolute
garbage and he said it made him from
then on and realized whatever’s going on
there may be something else going on as
well I mean I have compassion gave him
fewer rules for other people in his life
not a bad idea but we were talking about
people that don’t succeed in life and
why hope they succeed one they don’t
know the purpose of the game – they’ve
got tons of rules even though they’re
not the purpose how’d you like to be in
a game and you’re trying to win hey you
don’t know the goal and you got a
zillion rules you got to live by not be
pretty frustrating wouldn’t it well ads
step three to it here’s the third reason
people fail to win the game of life and
that is because their rules are in
conflict we’ve got all these different
special rules where we contradict
ourselves we’re in one situation you’re
supposed to be one way in another
situation is supposed to be totally
different in order to be effective see
if you got a bunch of rules in conflict
which most of us do you can have pain
you’re gonna have frustrations in your
life here’s the fourth reason why most
people won’t win the game of life
because even when the person plays by
the rules they don’t always win in other
words you do everything right you don’t
always get rewarded you give your all
you put your heart and soul on the line
you do everything right and still
sometimes it rains on your parade
sometimes you know a storm comes down
and beat the death out of your crop all
of a sudden you’re in the Midwest and
the flood comes and destroys all you’ve
worked on you know that kind of messes
your brain a little bit you start saying
hey you know why even try there’s no
meaning this everything I do is for
naught that’s worthless not realizing
there’s a deeper meaning there’s a
meaning beyond the moment that what’s
happening in this life right now this
event you can’t control whether it’s the
loss of a father as Becky has gone
through and a father-in-law as I have or
there’s loss of a business or anything
that seems to be a loss is a gain if you
ask yourself how can I use this what
else can this mean if I can’t use it
today how will I use this someday how
can I turn this into opportunity how can
I make myself more how can I use this
pain to sculpt my soul what can I do
right now to move myself forward these
are the kinds of questions I’ll support
you
instead of woes me why me why this have
to happen you’ll never get an answer to
those those questions will leave you in
an endless loop here’s the fifth reason
why most people fail in the game called
life sometimes you break the rules and
you win oh my gosh you do something you
know isn’t right you do something you
know you shouldn’t do something that’s
against your own values against your own
way of doing things and you get pleasure
and your brain goes hey for maybe
there’s some new rules out here maybe I
don’t have to live by these rules after
all when I work my butt off and did
everything right and helped myself to
size standard I got pain I break the
rule I got pleasure maybe this is how
it’s really wired maybe out of just like
take a look at life being this way you
know what it does it takes you away from
your higher purpose it takes you away
from what’s most important in your life
and while you might get pleasure in the
short term you give up that sense of
dignity within yourself that says you’re
doing the right thing that’s what causes
more people to fail life then I think
almost anything else cuz the ultimate
pleasure in life requires sometimes
short-term pain to get to it and that
ultimate pleasures who you become what
you contribute and the experience of
life that you have because of that
growth and contribution the sixth reason
when most people fail the game called
life is because in order to win this
game you got to work with five and a
half billion other people all have the
wrong rules they don’t know the purpose
of the game either and they are real
clear that there are certain rules you
must live by we all have different rules
because we’ve all learned different ways
of getting out of pain and into pleasure
in life we got to learn from one another
and finally the seventh reason why most
people fail the game called life it says
they think it’s a life and death game
and you say well it is a life and death
game well I’m the first person to agree
that this is not a practice session this
is the real thing that’s what I got to
live it full-on but if you think
everything is life and death every
moment you put so much pressure on
yourself that you truly will not live
life you’ll live in fear and that’s no
life at all how do you live life and win
the game well in spite of all this stuff
that sounds so terrible there are people
that seem to be winning seem to be
fulfilled seem to be making a difference
seem to have a great deal of joy in
their life and they seem to have it
consistently and they’re not doing it
through drugs or alcohol or distraction
they’re doing it through living a life
of significance how they done it they do
what we do in our date with destiny
seminar we accomplished seven things in
that seminar and I bring it up because I
hope you’ll take the time and actually
come we’ll get your purp
your mission statement and your values
all in the exact order you ideally need
them to be so you’re being pulled
adduction you want sitting pulled in
multiple directions but for right now
here’s what we do this is what we’re
gonna start doing on this tape it’s the
first thing these people have to succeed
or fulfilled as they decided what the
purpose of the game is at least for
right now do you follow me on this they
said okay I don’t know what the purpose
is ultimately but let me just decide for
right now the purpose of my life as to
what it’s to love and be loved is to
grow it’s to expand it’s to make a
difference to this is do that they come
up with a purpose which is what I want
you to do at the end of this tape to
start I know it’s not the end all and be
all from one tape but I want to get you
started on a mission statement a purpose
statement for your life you got to have
it if you don’t at least have a target
if you don’t know what the goal of the
game is you don’t know what to decide to
do we have all these choices all these
opportunities so you don’t have to
choose between something that’s good and
bad you have to change between something
that’s good and something that’s great
but if you don’t know what your purpose
is if you don’t know you value most in
life you can’t make an easy decision all
decision making is value clarification
so if you don’t know where you’re going
then you can get there by any road
you’re not gonna know the difference you
know everything looks like great
opportunity one of the biggest
challenges in life is choosing focusing
your life deciding what to spend your
time on what to spend your energy on
having a clear purpose of allows you to
do that the second thing you want to do
to make your life work and those who
succeed do this is they have fewer rules
the more rules you have about how people
have to be and how life has to be for
you to be happy the less happy you’re
gonna be see you know the happiest
people those people say you know every
day above ground is a great day happiest
people that people find joy in a smile
joy an adventure joy in a simple action
if you can find joy in that area then
all the big things are just a big bonus
for you in your life so when you find
yourself starting to react to something
that someone else has done and then you
might want to ask yourself how
significant is this really right is this
so bad is it okay for this person to
have a different opinion a different
view a different feeling than me in this
area in most cases you might say yeah it
is what would you have to believe in
order to be upset that everybody has to
live by your rules well maybe in some
areas that’s real important you may be
some others it’s not a significant you
just let go of it have a lot less pain
the third thing that people win the game
of life seem to have in common is
they’ve made their rules consistent they
found the conflicts in their life and
when they find them they’ve been honest
in himself and say this is a total
contradiction of what I normally believe
in other areas no more there’s not I’m
gonna live my life fourth thing these
people do that make them succeed is they
give themself pleasure whenever they win
even when the world doesn’t this is
really important you gotta realize that
sometimes you’ll do everything right you
won’t get acknowledged so what
acknowledged yourself you got to catch
yourself doing little things right and
give yourself the pleasure you deserve
after all if somebody else tells you hey
great job and that makes you feel good
it’s nothing saying great job that makes
you feel good it’s when they say great
job you stop and say oh that means I get
to feel good and you send a little
neurotransmitter they’re always yourself
to feel the pleasure feeling in your
body why not just give it to yourself
so that you keep yourself on track so
you’re always reinforcing good behaviors
excellent behaviors commitments to your
highest values fifth thing these people
have in common is when they screw up
when they don’t do things right when
they violate their own values when they
violate their own sense of purpose in
life they give themself a short burst of
pain they say this is not who I am I
stand for more they don’t wait to the
world to have to give them pain that’s
why they’re on track the sixth thing
that these people that win have in
common is that they know that everybody
life has different rules and so when
they get in a relationship with people
they know they’ve got to have other
people in our life to help succeed in
particular area they try to find out
their rules because if you know it’s
most important to people if you know
what their rules for life are what their
musts are in life it’s a lot easier and
lastly people who succeed in life
they’ve learned that life has a purpose
but they also at the same time don’t
take life too seriously
they don’t take themselves too seriously
what’s that all funny metaphor why do
angels fly because they take themselves
lately right the bottom line is we’ve
got to look at life in a different way
now with all this conversation we’ve had
here about purpose what are you and I
going to do right now so that you have a
greater sense of meaning well one is I
don’t need you just go out and create
this grandiose purpose and write pages
and pages and pages I think that the
simplest things can be the most powerful
things so if you can now close your eyes
and think about what you want to be when
you were going to
grow up go back to a time when you’re
five six seven eight nine ten years old
but you want to be back then what you
want to do who are your role models and
why did you want to be that think about
it just for a second your head as I’m
saying this it might be want to write a
few these things down in fact pretty
soon you’re definitely gonna want to
write things down so it might be good to
stop the tape right here and just think
about what your purpose is
and pull out a piece of paper and a pen
or a little computer and let’s work
together on this for a second what were
some of the things you wanted to be when
you were growing up when you’re a little
kid I remember one of the first things I
wanted to be was an archaeologist now
whatever you wanted to be here’s the
question I want to ask you why did you
want to be that in other words what was
the feeling you were hoping to get from
that what were the sensations what were
you wanting to be and do what were you
wanting me get from that when I think
back on I think about what I really want
to be as an archaeologist is I wanted to
discover things I mean that was the
biggest thing I want to discover things
that had not been a scare before
something new something unique something
different and I wanted to share that
with people I wanted to be a person who
went out discovered and then shared that
discovery with others and you know it’s
interesting I’m doing that today
I’m just not sticking my head in the
sand and doing it I’m doing it by
sticking my head in other people’s
brains and find out what makes them tick
and what find out what makes me tick and
then sharing some of that but that that
feeling that same feeling that I wanted
then I found a way to do it today in a
new way and so I challenge you think
about what was it you really wanted from
that didn’t think of something else you
wanted to be when you’re growing up I
wanted to also be a police artist later
on remember that you know those guys
that draw those pictures you know and
show people and catch the bad guys and
why did I want to do that what I want to
get from that oh gosh I thought about it
while uh I wanted to create I wanted to
be creative and and I wanted to help
people I wanted to help people do the
right things I wanted to be father
payment I wanted I catch the bad guys
but most importantly I wanted to create
and help people well guess what I found
a way to do that today different than I
originally thought but the same purpose
is there now maybe it’s not the same
purpose for you for all the things you
want to do maybe they have a common
thread or maybe they’re different
threads that are important what else did
you want to be when you’re growing up
and why did you want it what feelings
did you hope it would give you what do
you hope would come from it think for a
second
I’ll give you another one of mine while
you’re thinking try and trigger you what
else I want to do well I wanted to
definitely be a rock star I wanted to be
able to entertain people to change their
emotional states to use my voice and my
face and my body to give people more
passion in their lives and now I found
another way to do that plus I get to
work with some of these people the other
day I got a chance to go to the
Aerosmith concert I kind of grew up
listening to those guys and I found out
the Steven Tyler and some of these guys
are fans of mine as well went backstage
and I met Tim Collins who’s their
manager and he told me a phenomenal
story said that years ago in the early
80s when Aerosmith was in really bad
shape the guys were hooked on heroin and
they were losing everything financially
and the group had broken up that he
decided he’s gonna turn it around and he
read two books Think and Grow Rich and a
little book called unlimited power and
he said that what he learned there gave
him the inspiration and some of the
tools and strategies that get himself
off heroin and coke and they needed a
group intervention and help the other
guys do the same and these guys are now
on a mission they’re totally clean
they’re Evian water drinking guys that
are out there sharing their
rock-and-roll on their message and
they’re doing healthfully I got a chance
to meet Steven Tyler is just an
incredible guy I mean these guys have
been touring for 23 years giving their
all passionately every day I feel like
they’re brothers and it was really
interesting cuz he said you know I watch
it on TV all the time I feel like I walk
on the same path you know and he said I
listened to your tapes he said we really
have the same mission said you know do
you think you’d get together us and do a
gig for us I said what do you mean he’s
more like you know the guys on the
weekend could you maybe like do your gig
for us so we can all participate on one
weekend as their a laugh and I pinched
myself I said how cool now I get to do a
gig for Aerosmith I’m not out there rock
and rolling but sort of I am I’m working
with the rock and rollers those fun so
my point is maybe you’re not doing what
you originally envisioned but maybe
you’ll find a way to do it even better
if you have some faith maybe if you keep
developing yourself and you know at
least the emotion you want the
contribution you want to create you’ll
find a better way most importantly
before you can find the way you got to
know the essence of what it is you
really want what is that purpose that’s
what I’m really asking you about now
with your eyes closed again think about
a situation in your life when you felt
like you’re really on a roll
you know the kind of situation I’m
talking about well you just felt
incredibly good at great feelings where
things were just flowing things were
effortless when you thought yourself wow
I love this this is what life’s about I
love this is it this is this is what
life is really about
can you remember time like that in your
life at any age younger all well you
really felt like you’re in that flow
even this is it this is what life’s
about think of a situation like that
right now remember that time you step
back into your mind back in your body
like you were then and look through your
own eyes as you were then when you felt
like this is what life’s about and see
what you saw hear what you heard what
were you doing what were you feeling
what would the state you were in what
were you experiencing yeah think about
it and tell me what is it and it was
there anything in common with this with
some of the other things you’ve wanted
to have in your life the feelings you
wanted to have maybe you wanted to grow
or create or contributor discover or
expand or challenge what is it love what
were the feelings and what were you
doing and then when you get a sense of
what that was then think about this
think of another situation in your life
think of a second one when you felt like
you’re on a roll at some other point in
your life when things were flowing when
you felt this is it this is what life’s
about I love this think of another time
like that we step into that situation as
well
step into it right now and she step in
that situation look around see what you
saw and hear what you heard then feel
what you were feeling men what was
happening in that moment not just what
you were doing notice what you were
doing were you creating or writing or
speaking and communicating or or
manufacturing something or studying or
learning and what were you doing but
also how are you feeling what would the
state you’re in and what were you doing
for others that they were involved what
other people involved what was the
process what how are you being and what
were you doing feel in your body
is there anything but this is similar
between this and the last experience or
anything about this that’s similar
between this and the feelings that you
wanted from those things you wanted to
be when you’re gonna grow up
that’s it notice it and capture not only
the idea of this but the feeling as well
now one more time think of something
else
another time at any age when you felt
like you’re on a major role things were
really flowing we felt incredible when
you felt like I love this this is what
life’s really about
zette think of another situation like
that right now and as you step into that
situation right now
notice what were you doing what were you
creating what we have sharing what were
you feeling feeling these feelings think
about the purpose of your life if you
were gonna say it in a simple phrase not
even paragraphs in paragraphs simple
phrase or a sentence or two and you’re
gonna write down the purpose of my life
is to what if you’re gonna do it you’re
gonna have a couple simple criteria one
has got to be stated positive not the
personal life has to stop all the
horrible things in the world no no
something positive something stated in
the positive and info it’s gonna be
something brief and it was gonna be
something emotionally charged in terms
of its words for you and it has to have
how you’re gonna be as a person and what
are you gonna do and it’s gotta include
not just other people like I’m gonna
change other people’s lives or I’m gonna
make the world better for other people
it’s gotta you got to be in your own
mission statement you got to be your own
purpose statement you got to be in there
too and other people don’t so have a
purpose of my life is for me to be happy
because we’re all connected so if it’s
you and others being and doing brief and
sure what is the purpose of your life
what is it right now what comes out of
your head not the right answer not the
perfect answer just the answer the
purpose your life is to be and do what
for yourself another just say it out
loud just say it don’t even write it
down first and you got pen and paper
then write it down purpose my life is to
what say it again try something keep
changing it and if you write it down
each time it’ll give you better saw it
I’d prefer if you wrote it down but just
come up with something the purpose of my
life for me Tony Robbins is to serve God
and my fellow man by being a powerful
loving passionate outrageous courageous
strong playful crazy example of the
unlimited possibilities that God gives
when you commit your life to service
when you really focused on contribution
that’s what my life’s about I know what
I feel I can change the word slightly
here and there but I know the essence of
my life and you’ve got to know what that
is for you that is what will help you to
make the decisions that’ll give you the
motivation to get up early and stay up
late that’ll make you connect with
people the way you’ve never connected
before but you got to know what it is
and it’s got to be more than just you
you and others got to be brief it’s got
to be emotional it’s got to be intense
so go do it right now turn off the tape
and just start writing like crazy what
is the purpose of your life and when you
write something write another thing
that right another one keep writing it
better and better – you got something
you like them – turn the tape back on go
for it do it now the purpose of your
life is to what
you did turn the stave off didn’t you
you’re not just sitting there thinking
come on if you write it out it’ll be
better with more precision turn it off
and if you’re on your way back then just
ignore the last sentence welcome back
Maddie you got something you really like
I hope so I know it’s not the end-all
be-all and it better not be perfect or
I’m gonna come through this tape and
grab you your job is not to be perfect
it’s to be excellent perfection can
never really be achieved anyway if
you’re truly a perfectionist then it’s
never perfect but it’s getting better
all the time so what is the purpose of
your life and how does it feel and you
think about this is the purpose of my
life and let me give you one other
criteria did you write it so you can
only achieve it once you die if so
change it because we don’t want you have
to die to achieve your purpose which is
what some people have it should be
something you can experience every day
you know whatever you do whether you’re
just sitting at the lunch counter you’re
walking through a grocery store you’re
going and conducting your business I
don’t care what it is it should be
something you can feel and you gotta
find what that is for you and I had a
language that at least for now see and
know the goal of the game with that your
life takes on a whole nother dimension
so as you go out over the next month try
something
take this purpose statement and keep in
front of you put it in the system use
for managing your time and keeping your
to-do lists put it up on the wall nearby
and as you look at it each day don’t
just write it and forget about it
think about each day how can I live my
purpose more when you go to make a
decision about doing something and
you’re not sure why you’re doing it you
can always go back to your purpose you
can do it going into a meeting you don’t
already go in the meeting room I’m going
to media I’m gonna be powerful loving
passion outrageous play for them and
inspire people to see what’s possible if
we really serve all the people around us
that’s not how to figure out you have a
guiding principle no matter what happens
principles don’t change the essence of
who you are will not change the
environment may change the vehicles may
change but what’s inside of you won’t
let me say one final thing to you before
sin do you often have you take some more
time to work on your mission statement
one is if you want to send me your
mission statement to Robbins research
I’d love to receive it I’d love to see
how you’ve language the purpose of your
life so if you feel like doing that
please do and address it to me
personally but the other thing is this I
want you to realize that very often not
getting your dream
gives you your destiny what I mean by
that is this so often as I said when we
started this tape people set up a goal
or a demon they don’t get it and then he
feels so disappointed so frustrated
sometimes resentful towards others or to
their creator or towards themselves for
not accomplishing or achieving it but
the truth of the matter is whenever
something happens you must find an
empowering meaning you must ask yourself
how can I use this if this was to serve
a higher purpose in my life how would I
use it to serve a higher purpose if this
was gonna make me into somebody more how
would I use it to make me more and very
often in life if you really look back on
your life the worst situations in your
life have been the best if you were
willing to trust that it happened for a
reason
that somehow even though this is painful
and you’d never want it to happen again
somehow this is gonna serve you maybe
you were hurt by someone or some
situation but because of that your kids
will never be hurt the same way you did
when you were a child or maybe you went
through some tough time but because of
that you’d be I hope somebody else so
they won’t have to go through the same
pain you did maybe the pain made you
make a new decision to send you in a
brand new direction that brought you to
this destiny I really truly believe in
my heart of hearts that if were willing
to trust and have faith and look for
answers and actively pursue them that
every human experience supports us even
those that are painful and I believe we
can probably do them without the pain
but the pain to strike or something
happens outside your control which it
will that instead of living in fear
that’ll happen someday you want to live
from the sense of certainty that says no
matter what happens I will benefit from
it because I will look for benefits and
therefore I will find them it’s that
simple and I’ll give you a good metaphor
you know there’s a great movie I’m sure
you recall was called Field of Dreams
in it they said if you build it they
will come
in the movie Kevin Costner seeks out an
old man by the name of dr. am he’s
played by Burt Lancaster and when he
first meets this man he’s going to see
him to tell him about a field of dreams
that Kevin has developed a place where
these old men could come back and play
again to be young again
to live their dream and when he meets
doc Graham he starts to talk to him and
he says I understand that you only were
able to play one inning in your life cuz
doc Graham said well yeah my whole
life’s dream was always to play baseball
to be
passionately said every single day I
gave my all I lived this passion he said
you know I took ground balls and batting
practice and I pushed myself and he said
finally I made it I made it to the big
leagues and the whole season went by
without my being able to play and
finally at the end of the season in the
eighth inning the coach looked over at
me and said kid I want you in right
field he said I was so happy I couldn’t
believe it I ran out on the field and he
said I stood out there in right field
waiting for somebody hit it to me
waiting for my chance and nothing
happened then when we came back in he
said my turn to bat never came and the
next year they without giving me another
chance or even giving me a chance they
sent me back to the minor leagues and he
said I couldn’t I just couldn’t take it
I couldn’t take going through that again
so I quit and kevin costner said oh my
god that that’s unbelievable what an
incredible pain what devastation that
must have destroyed you I mean for any
man to be that close to his dream and
have your dream pass you by as if it
doesn’t even know it’s you he said that
that must have been the most destructive
painful thing that that that’s a total
disaster and when Mike Graham said no
son he said playing baseball for only
five minutes was not a disaster
playing baseball for all only five
minutes was not devastating what would
have been a disaster what would have
been devastating is if I’d only been a
doctor for five minutes you see if I
would hit that baseball that may have
been the bigger disaster cuz then I
never would have come to this little
town I never would have saved this man’s
life or delivered that little girl or
got to know the people that now my best
friend’s in the world he said that would
have been a disaster in other words
sometimes not getting your dream give
you what you really want what you really
need what you’re really destined for and
if that part of the movie didn’t give it
to you they followed up with another
scene finally there’s a chance you know
Kevin Costner makes arrangements and he
said listen there’s this Field of Dreams
you
can come on it you can be young again
you can live your dream still and he
brings moonlight Graham to the field
with all the other players and when he
steps out on the field he’s young again
and he’s wearing his uniform and he
could feel the warm sunshine on his body
again and these youthful muscles and to
smell the fresh cut grass and the
baseball in his hand and finally they’re
beginning to play and just as moonlight
Graham is finally stepping in the
batter’s box finally he’s gonna get a
chance to get that hit in life in
professional baseball his dream right at
that moment there’s a scream in the
stands coz Kevin Costner and his brother
having a conversation and his brother
doesn’t see these players on the field
he doesn’t have his faith to experience
the beauty and the joy and the fun and
what’s right there in front of him he
can’t see it because of his lack of
faith and as they’re arguing about this
he accidentally turns and knocks Kevin
Costner’s daughter off the top of the
stands she falls and hits her head and
she starts turning blue and so all of a
sudden they start yelling oh my god oh
my god what we can do we gotta save her
she’s dying she’s dying in the whole
sudden Costner sisters we need a doctor
we need a doctor and just as he hears
those words moonlight Graham is about to
swing the bat
he says I’m a doctor he starts running
full blast to help this child but all of
a sudden he stops and he looks down and
there in front of him is the foul line
the foul line that divides the field of
dreams from the other world and he knows
if he crosses it he can never go back he
can never live his dream he doesn’t
hesitate anymore he immediately steps
across and he saves the child’s life he
loses his dream but he lives his destiny
Morel is very simple inside each one of
us there are desires that we have for
our personality those things that we
want to avoid pain and want to gain
pleasure for but there are also moral
needs though those needs inside of us to
go beyond ourselves to something greater
to something more to give of ourselves
in a way that maybe we’ve never given
before maybe a way there won’t even be
acknowledged but will give us the
a sense of a film we’ve ever dreamed of
in our lives I say to you that if what
you’ve tried so far hasn’t worked all of
this is preparing you for more but don’t
wait for the ultimate day when you save
a life
start saving a life today by enjoying
the one you have start saving a life
today by touching the people around you
you know do what Cecil did be a person
that loves people animals beings be a
person when things don’t go on you well
plant twice as much be a person who
gives more than anybody else gives and
you’ll be living your purpose no matter
how you language it hold yourself to a
higher standard and someday you’ll see
something more dramatic but along the
way you’ll enjoy the joy of knowing that
you’re living your life’s purpose today
isn’t that what life’s really about not
waiting until some day living it today
hey I want to thank you for spending
this time with me I am so grateful to
God to have the opportunity to connect
with you as if we’ve been friends for
years
and we’ve not even met but I hope in
this time together that you’ve found
some some strategies some tools and
maybe found a piece of yourself reminded
yourself of the truth of how unique and
special you are not an egotistical way
but everyone is everyone is unique and
special in some way and to think less of
yourself is to slap the face of your
Creator
you’ve been given gifts and it’s time to
make them real and get in the edge has
been about sharing with you some of
those tools and the most important ones
are taking that time for yourself please
do that for yourself consistently if you
did nothing else out of this but that I
promise you you’ll see your future
unfold and you’ll hear the whispers of
destiny
you’ll hear the guidance that’s within
you but you got to take time to be alone
and do that if you do it every day
you’ll see a change if you go through
that results workshop and just change
anything you’re not willing to settle
for any more and be honest with yourself
if you take and make those relationships
magnificent and not settle in this area
either oh my god everything a life
changes when you’ve got someone to share
with that you’ll love everyone you’ve
ever been a relationship with is a bonus
to you it’s
God’s great gifts but if you can find
that soulmate you got everything and I
have to say that for me finding my
soulmate finding my wife’s age was the
richest day of my life and every day as
Richard because of it I hope for you my
prayer for you as you find someone like
that that you have that kind of love for
and they have that kind of love for you
or if they’re there that you treasure
them and you find a way to make that
juicier every single day if you do that
and on top of it you energize and
alkalis and get that vitality in your
body can master your finances turn your
emotions into your friend and you find
your purpose then the life you create
will be so much greater than your dreams
your old dreams will seem like cartoons
by comparison to the life you’re living
and if you’re able to make those kinds
of changes you’ll be able to stand proud
knowing you’re the one that did it but
also have a special prize knowing that
maybe I helped in some little way to
guide you deeper into connecting with
yourself because the ultimate edge is
connection with yourself with your
Creator with your friends with your
family with life itself and if you do
that then these seven sessions were
certainly well worth both our time so I
wish you well my friend and for now I
saved so long but I hope I’ll see you
sometime soon and you’ll share with me
the story of your success and what
you’ve done please email me write me or
come see me in a seminar I’d love to
meet you personally but until then make
sure that every day is lived to the
fullest don’t settle for less than you
can be be one of the few who do versus
the men you talk and be sure to live
with passion god bless
I hope to see you soon
[Music]
you

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